On Friendship and Faith

This blog has suffered much neglect these past few weeks, but soon, that will be remedied. Our calendar has been overflowing with rich and engaging youth ministry experiences; the blog has necessarily taken a back seat.  But - to get back on track - I read an article this morning that was too important not to share right away.  It serves as an excellent reminder of what the youth and children among us have to offer our greater church family, especially in the relationships and friendships formed, nurtured, and valued - transcending generations.

I found this story at Vibrant Faith at Home; I'm reposting here:

The Last Pew in Back 

by Michael Theisen

Sarah was seven when she met Evelyn for the first time, who easily had a 75 year head start on life. Sarah, the oldest of three, was given the “big job” of watching her younger brother and sister as together they occupied the last pew of the church during the 5:00 pm Saturday Worship Service. They always sat in that last pew, and always at the same service, because it was the closest one to the doors where her parents were stationed in their weekly role as “greeters”.

Sarah thought Evelyn looked lonely sitting all by herself in the pew so at the end of worship she leaned over and offered her one of the pictures she had drawn, along with a smile and a short seven-year old introduction, causing Evelyn to smile too, a first for her that day. The following Saturday at 5 pm Evelyn showed up in the pew next to Sarah again and the picture exchange was repeated, this time before worship started, along with a few more back and forth exchanges. The next several weeks turned into months and the months into five years as Sarah, then twelve, and Evelyn exchanged many more stories than pictures on Saturdays at 5:00 pm. Evelyn wanted to know how was Sarah was doing in school? Did she make the play? Where did she go on vacation? Did she work out the problem with her neighbor friend? Their weekly reunions in the last pew in the back had become a highlight for both.

Later that year, Evelyn began missing worship, and after the third week in a row, Sarah grew worried. During the reading of the prayers, Sarah heard Evelyn’s name read aloud under the list of those who had passed away that week. She turned to her parents, tears already on her cheeks and cried, “I have to go to her funeral!”  Sarah’s mom held onto Sarah and tried to comfort her. She said that the funeral would most likely be during school, but Sarah didn’t care, she had to say goodbye to her 5:00 Saturday friend.

The wake was held later that week at the church. As Sarah walked toward the casket that held Evelyn, she was encircled by a group of strangers who were all staring at her. “I bet you’re Sarah,” one of the women said with tears forming in her eyes. “Yes I am,” Sarah replied with surprise, “how did you know?” “Oh, we know all about you!” a man said who was standing next to the woman. “Evelyn was our Mother, and you were her favorite reason to come to church.”

As he said this, his sister held up a stack of slightly wrinkled color drawings. “Up until yesterday these decorated our Mother’s refrigerator for the past five years. Some weeks she wasn’t really up to going to church, but she would insist saying, ‘I have to see my friend Sarah!’ You were a Godsend to her and we had hoped you would come today so we could finally meet you in person and thank you for making her feel so welcomed at church.”

I first heard Sarah share this story on a youth retreat as a senior in high school, explaining why she chose to become a greeter at the age of thirteen, and how she now finds herself standing alongside her parents behind the last pew in church as they welcome those coming to the Saturday 5:00 pm Worship.

As a parent, do you ever wonder if the choices you make have any impact upon your children? We may believe our efforts go for naught or that we are just going through the motions as a family, but the reality is that what we do as parents matter… a lot! May we never lose sight of the eyes that are always upon us and the hearts that are still being formed by what we do and how we do it.

 ********************************************************
Indeed, how could I not think of my own children when I read this?  The most highly anticipated moment of church each Sunday for Pax is the time just after communion.  His weekly ritual includes a solemn receiving of the bread and wine, usually accompanied by a loud "Amen." Every week, I remind him to walk back nicely to the pew, and every week, he darts ahead of me, just out of reach, to smack the banner hanging in the side aisle on the way back.  He run-walks ahead, bypassing our pew until he reaches the very back, where his Buddy (Mr. N.) is running the sound system.  Pax sneaks in under his arm, quiet as a mouse (which is, in itself, remarkable, as those who sit near us can attest).  Sometimes, he helps with pushing a few buttons.  Other times, he stands and watches. Always, he is welcomed, included, and embraced.  A little later, Pax returns to our pew, his breath fresh from the tic tacs he gets from Mr. N.  He looks at me and grins.

Their friendship?  It matters.... in the eyes that are watching, the hearts that are growing, the faith that is forming.

A mile in her shoes

"Don't judge a person until you've walked a mile in her shoes."

During our continuing conversation on homelessness, our youth groups had the chance to experience - quite literally - what it feels like to walk in another's shoes.  We piled our shoes into one big lump in the middle of the room, then re-distributed them to new wearers.  We noticed our pleasure in a new style; our pain in shoes that were too tight; our clumsy steps in overlarge sneakers.  We observed that our trek from the undercroft to the fellowship hall was awkward, difficult to navigate the stairs, and downright uncomfortable at times.  

Later, we metaphorically walked in the shoes of our PACEM guests - those women who are finding shelter in our church home for two week's worth of nights.  We absorbed the cots on which they sleep, the large room, the proximity to other guests, the aspects of sleeping in a fellowship hall with a dozen other people that may prove challenging.  We imagined ourselves in their shoes, in their circumstances, in their struggles to meet basic life-sustaining needs.

We listened to a reading from Matthew, chapter 25: 31-46, with a particular focus on 37-40:

Then the good people will answer, "Lord, when did we see you hungry and give you food, or thirsty and give you something to drink?  When did we see you alone and away from home and invite you into our house?  When did we see you without clothes and give you something to wear?  When did we see you sick or in prison and care for you?"  Then the King will answer, "I tell you the truth, anything you did for even the least of my people here, you also did for me."  

We remembered that we are called to love our neighbor as ourselves, and the best way in which we can show our love for God is to take care of the least of God's people on earth.

It was a powerful reminder of who we are and what we are called to do.

Pizza and Skating!

At the end of January, our group met up on a Friday night for an evening of delicious pizza and two hours of ice skating.  What a fun night!!  Highlights included playing tag around the rink, racing each other while dodging the masses, "ghosting" people as they skated, and generally goofing off and being silly.  We decided that next time, we want to be the ones to drive the Zamboni around the rink... (which might appeal to N. a bit more than the skates did!)

It was a fantastic night of fellowship and friendship. Yay!

The Year in Review

What a year it's been - enjoy!!

(Click here for an awesome slide show presentation.....)

Summer Mission Project Bake Sale

In December, our Summer Mission Project team (along with the terrific help and support of many more of our youth) hosted its first fundraising effort for our trip to Washington, D.C. in June.  The bake sale was a *complete* success!  The congregation was generous in donating baked goods for the "free will donation," and even more generous in its financial support. 

Wow!!!!  We, the Summer Mission Project team, are feeling incredibly lucky and blessed by the support and encouragement so clearly demonstrated in the bake sale.

Many, many thanks to each and every one of you who made this event such a success!

Paul (one of our advisors on the trip), hard at work!

4 out of 6 of our awesome SMP team youth!! 

Youth Group Christmas Dinner

A "wintry snow event" forced us to postpone the much-anticipated Christmas dinner at Anne's house, but when we were finally able to gather, the evening proved to be lovely and jolly.  We began the evening with a little "sing off" of sorts.  Working in two teams, each group came up with as many Christmas carols as possible and jotted them down on a piece of paper.  After the allotted time was up, the two groups met again and took turns singing the first line of a song from their sheet.  If the other team had the same song, neither team got credit.  The team with the most points at the end was declared the winner - and got to help themselves to dinner first.  

TEAM A:

TEAM A+ (the winning team):

We enjoyed a meal of lasagna, salad, and bread....

And after dinner, we gathered in front of the cozy fire to watch this sweet sweet video:

Click here!

(Later, someone sent me this "full version" story, also beautifully and wonderfully told...)

We listened to the story of Jesus' birth from the Gospel of Luke, and we talked about what it means to shine our light into dark places during this season of literal - and, for many - figurative darkness.  Following some good discussion and sharing, we sang happy birthday to the baby Jesus and enjoyed some cake.  (In case you were wondering or didn't know this about the Baby Jesus, his favorite kind of cake happens to be yellow with chocolate frosting.)

Our time together ended too soon, as good times often do. 

A Very Merry Christmas, indeed!

Sweeter than Honey

The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul;
the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple;

the precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart;
the commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes;

the fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever;
the rules of the Lord are true, and righteous altogether.

More to be desired are they than gold, even much fine gold
sweeter also than honey and drippings of the honeycomb.

-Psalm 19: 7-10

This past weekend, our 5 Confirmands, plus two adult advisors and two LSM students serving as small group leaders, headed to the ELCA's event called Lost and Found.  It was an amazing weekend filled with laughter, respite, and spiritual renewal.  The theme of the weekend, "Sweeter Than Honey" from Psalm 19, taught us to focus more closely on the Law of the Lord, learning and remembering how much we can feel God's guidance, acceptance, and love when we follow God's way of living. 

We made new friends in our small groups and in our cabin mates; we praised God in the many songs we sang during large group gatherings and worship; we celebrated each other's gifts in watching the talent show; we asked questions, offered our own perspectives, and listened to others, shaping and growing in our own faith.  

The youth spoke overwhelmingly about making connections to others in their group, and the contentment they felt in being able to "go deep" with their groups.  For some, this was the first experience they'd had in doing so.  They also shared how much they loved the music we sang, and enjoyed the sermon offered during Saturday night's service of worship.  They each expressed feeling even more closely bonded to and connected to one another in the time we shared as a St. Mark group.  Indeed, this was the highlight of the weekend for me - the chance to grow closer to each one of them individually, as well as the opportunity to strengthen the bond that we share together as a group:

"Group High Five" at dinner

Other joys include...

...This Godsight, spotted on our second night in the beautiful twilight sky:

...the leadership of Tony and our LSM students.  It was a particular joy for me to be able to share this ministry with three passionate, engaged, and enthusiastic leaders.  I am most grateful to each of them, for the trip would not have been the same without their guidance, faithful example, and good humor.   

...Bearing witness to hundreds of seventh and eighth grade students, defying many of the worst stereotypes with which they're commonly labeled.  I saw so much kindness, respect, and acceptance among the youth:  words of encouragement and praise after an unusual talent show performance; deliberate reaching out to small group members who didn't quite fit in as well; cheerful acceptance and genuine love for peers of every kind.

...and our 5 Confirmands are particularly wonderful.  When I think of these 5, I think of them as kids who let their light shine bright, who brighten up dark passages, who reflect the love of Christ, and who seek to help others to know the fullness of God's love for each of us.  

Is it any wonder they make me think of bright, shining, twinkling light in dark places, when this is what they choose to do during free time?

Good and Gracious God, thank you for the gift of these young people.  Help them to feel your presence in their lives; help them to live in ways that are pleasing and faithful to You. Preserve the kindness, acceptance, tolerance and respect that they so clearly offer this world.  Let them continue to fill this dark world with their shining light, and their laughter. Amen.